Cyber-Bullying

I got on AOL today to check my mail and as I often do, look through some of the news stories of the day. The one that caught my eye was on Lori Drew, the woman who created a fake Myspace and bullied the 13-year-old Megan Meier. Megan took her life after this mother pretended to be a boy who liked Megan and then started saying very cruel things to her. I have to add that Megan is not the first and only, and I have to add, probably not the last, to take their young lives because of bullying of any kind, not just online.

I was looking through these photos of all these young children and of course thinking of my own. We all know we can't stop bullying, it has gone on for as long as time I am sure, but how do we protect our children? I have a few suggestions:

1st off, social networking is not for children (by saying children I also mean teenagers.) We don't know who is behind that profile, is it really who we think it is? The best way to protect our children is telling them no. Tay has begged me for a year for one but I stand my ground and let her know when she is of age (18) she may have one.

2ND, know your child and their friends, who are they and what are they doing? I listen to Taylor talking when she is on the phone, if something is questionable, I confront her on it and as a parent I can tell when she is holding back and I can get it out. I know where she is and what she is doing, she may hate it but I know one day she will understand and that is fine with me.

3rd, make sure it's not your child who is doing the bullying. I nip this in the bud anytime I hear Taylor or Jimmy getting that snotty voice with kids outside. I want them to stick up for themselves but not at anytime are they to talk about a child or speak hateful words to them.

4Th, WE have to be parents to our children. I cannot stress this too much. We brought them in this world to care and love but people tend to let their children run free after they get past that toddler age. STOP...TAKE CARE OF YOUR CHILD!! Get them up in the morning, make sure they eat their breakfast and help them dress (or at least let them know they make good choices on their outfit they picked out), get them off to school and when they get home look over their school work and if they have homework help them. I say help them because all I hear around my neighborhood at "homework time" is parents screaming at their children. OMG, this irks me more than anything else, have they thought that maybe their children are having a hard time and need help from the parent? Know where your children are, if they are playing outside, know the parents of the children they play with, know the children, make sure they are in ear shot so you know what is going on in their social lives. You are not a bad parent for not letting your children roam free.

5Th, let's love them. Show them each and everyday what joy they have brought you, what they are worth. Children are not a burden and I hate to hear parents complain about their children. It's one thing to have a bad day, we all have them, but don't make our children think they are to blame. I notice for myself that my children react to how I am feeling and I get a little more edgy with them than normal when I am agitated. Let them know daily, hug them, kiss them and tell them what special qualities they have that makes them so special to you (very important if you have more than one child.)

I am so saddened that children think that is the only way out of this. We all say "Children are cruel" but we as parents need to make sure our children are not and show our children they are loved and valued. Lets stop this horrible cycle. Say no to computers in bedrooms, if you are not home invest in computer software that shows page by page and keystrokes your children are performing--it may surprise you what your child is looking or talking about. We are responsible for our children's safety and help keep them from predators inside and outside of our home.